Hard to Remember
by Taya8989
Summary: . Brooke was known as the good time party girl and no one really knew how terribly sad and worthless she felt. This story is Brooke Centric. Later Brucas and Breyton. Mentions abuse. It is rated T at the moment, but possibly M in later chapters.
1. Chapter 1

**So it is set a few weeks after the drink spiking episode in season one. However Lucas and Nate are pretty good friends. Hayley and Nate are together and Hayley, Brooke and Peyton are just starting to become really good friends. I set it in season one because I wanted Lucas and Brooke to not really know each other yet. Hope you like it so far!**

Lying in the middle of her bedroom floor, Brooke Davis stared at her ceiling. She had some random mix Peyton had made for her blaring in the background and she fought hard to silence her thoughts and let the music wash away her loneliness. Brooke was known as the good time party girl and no one really knew how terribly sad and worthless she felt. Her mother was never around and her father was always screaming at her; the guys she knew didn't respect her and Peyton was her only true friend. She grabbed the half-empty vodka bottle from under her bed and took a generous mouthful. It helped her zone out and made reality hurt a bit less. Just as she was going for another mouthful, her cell rang. It was Lucas. A warm feeling overcame her as she went to pick up the call. It had been two weeks since she had called him to come and resume her and Peyton from a college party. Peyton's drink had been spiked and Brooke felt responsible. Lucas had always believed the rumours about Brooke, until that night. He saw how fragile and scared she was for Peyton. She was a good friend and he felt bad for stereotyping her.

"Hey Brooke, how are you going?" Lucas asked, hoping she was in a good mood.

"Hey Luke, I'm ok. Could be better, but you know Peyton's mixes, they always made you feel like shooting up and dying." Brooke didn't really mean it, but part of her felt like leaving this world behind might solve everything.

"Well a few of the guys from the team are heading down to Nate's beachhouse and were wanting to know if you and some girls from the squad wanted to join us." Luke knew he didn't really need to call Brooke for all of the girls to find out, but he really felt like hearing her voice and thought this was a good excuse.

"Yeah, sounds like it could be fun. It's not like there is anything else to do tonight." Brooke tried to sound cool, but she was actually kind of nervous to be speaking to Lucas.

"Ok, cool, well I'll see you soon."

"See you soon."

Brooke got herself together, put some makeup on and rang Peyton and the girls. Peyton decided Brooke didn't sound up to driving so she would come by and pick her up. As Brooke waited for Peyton to arrive she walked downstairs and made herself a weird alcoholic concoction. As she was finishing it off her father walked into the kitchen.

"Where are you off to in that skirt?" Richard Davis asked. His question didn't really come out of concern for his daughter, but feared her reputation might reflect badly on him.

"A party. What's it to you anyway?" Brooke asked. She barely spoke to her father and when she did it always ended up in an argument.

"Well, I hardly think it's appropriate. You look like a slut."

"Like I care what you think," Brooke responded quickly, hurt by what he had said.

"Change now or else you're not going out!" Richard was furious. Brooke was so insolent and he was not used to her talking back at him.

"NO! I can wear what I want and you haven't said anything before."

Richard glared at his daughter. She not only got her mother's looks but also her attitude. Brooke was a beautiful girl but she loved disobeying him. Richard could feel his pulse race and his hands became clammy. He was so outraged by her and he felt so much resentment toward her that his anger came rushing out. He grabbed Brooke by the arm and pushed her towards the stairs.

"Dad you're hurting me. Stop it! What are you doing?" Brooke screamed, startled by her father's aggression. He had always been an angry man and he knew that she reminded him of her mother, a woman he despised, but he had never physically harmed her before.

"Stop screaming at me. If you know what's good for you, you will do as I say," Richard felt proud for finally taking a stand against his daughter's blatant disrespect for him. He could see the fear in her eyes and it felt strangely rewarding.

He shoved her up the stairs and she fell over. She winced in pain but he picked her up b her hair and slammed her against her bedroom door.

"Now change into something more decent!" Richard slammed her door and walked down to his office. He was happy she was finally listening to him and stopped with the back chatting.

Brooke slumped against her door. Her arm was red from where her father had grabbed her and her a clump of hair had fallen onto her lap. She was shocked by what had just happened and suddenly tears streamed down her face. She changed into a knee length dress and swallowed the remaining vodka. Her cell rand and Peyton was downstairs waiting. She quickly wiped away her tears and fixed her smudged makeup before rushing downstairs to meet Peyton and get seriously wasted.


	2. Chapter 2

Hard to remember 2

As Peyton pulled into the street near the beach house, Brooke could see Lucas's truck parked a few meters ahead. She was glad to be seeing him again and hoped the party would erase the memories of the confrontation with her father.

"Brooke, you coming?" Peyton yelled as she slammed the car door.

"A yeah. Sorry, I guess I was just off somewhere," Brooke muttered, a bit hazy from the alcohol and daydreaming.

"Just promise me you won't get more wasted than you already are. I don't want to be hearing you vomit in my bathroom again." Peyton was joking, but she was actually starting to get worried by Brooke's constant drinking and she had been acting really weird in the car ride over.

"I'll try to keep it together, but I can't make any promises P. Sawyer. You're only young once you know," Brooke said jokingly, trying to lighten the mood.

The girls made their way over to the beach house and quickly spotted Hayley.

"Hey girls," Hayley said in her usual upbeat tone.

"Hey Halyes," both girls replied in unison.

"What's with the dress Brooke? I don't think I've seen you in anything that comes down to your knees in like forever," Hayley joked.

"Ha ha. I actually thought I would try something new tonight. I'm thinking I'll make the guys work a bit harder than usual," Brooke thought quickly to come up with that answer. It wasn't exactly like she was dressed like a nun, but it was different from her usual party attire.

"Hey Hayles, where did you put the rest of the ice?" Nathan called out from the kitchen.

"It's on the deck," Hayley yelled back. This was the first real party they had thrown together and she was loving it.

"I can't find it," Nathan yelled again, this time sounding a bit annoyed.

"It's there. Don't worry, I'm coming!" Hayley though it was better to go get it before he had a breakdown.

"Girls I'll be back in a sec".

Brooke and Peyton nodded, they knew Nathan and how frustrated he could get so they both looked at each other and kind of laughed.

The girls stood around and chatted for a bit and the Brooke and Peyton both turned as Lucas walked over to them.

"Hi Luke," Brooke said, sounding a little bit reserved.

"Hey Brooke, Peyton. Glad you guys could come. Can I get you a drink or something?" Luke thought both girls looked great, but since Peyton hadn't exactly been ready to make a commitment he had started thinking that maybe he had overlooked Brooke. She was beautiful and kind and so what she could be a bit crazy. He really wanted to get to know the real Brooke.

"Sure, I'll have some vodka and lemonade," Brooke replied, a little too quickly.

"Umm, I'll have whatever," Peyton wasn't really a huge drinker and didn't really care what she had, she just wanted Luke to go away. She was confused about the way she felt for him and she had made things had become awkward between them since she didn't want to get as emotionally involved as he did. She felt like her chances with him were slipping away and she realised that Brooke had feelings for him

"Ok, I'll be back in a sec," and with that Luke disappeared. He noticed Peyton's reluctance to look him in the eye and he felt stupid for ever caring about her. He had put himself out there and she had rejected him. Even so, he felt maybe there was still a chance.

As Luke headed back to the girls with their drinks, he noticed the door to the main bedroom was open. No one was supposed to be in there and he didn't relish at the thought of having to break up some couple having sex. He slowly opened the door and peeked inside. He saw Brooke sitting on the edge of the bed. She was facing the wall and couldn't see him. She looked so venerable. Her head was lowered onto her hands and it sounded as though she was crying.

"Brooke?" Lucas said gently.

Brooke immediately jumped and tried to hide her face from him.

"What's wrong? Have you been crying?" Lucas asked, careful not to come on too strongly.

"No, I'm fine. I just needed some space. I think I've had a bit too much to drink and just needed to clear my head."

Her response sounded automated and Lucas felt that she was hiding something.

"I know, we are just getting to know each other, but if something was wrong you could talk to me." Lucas genuinely liked Brooke and although he had unresolved feeling for Peyton, he pushed them aside. He was worried about Brooke. He knew she had a history and her family was screwed up, but it couldn't be more screwed up than his.

"Sure Luke, thanks. Hey is that my drink you're holding?" quick to change the subject Brooke, grabbed her drink and rejoined the party.

That night, Luke watched Brooke. He noticed the way all the guys swarmed over her. He saw her face light up when they made lame attempts at flirting with her and his heart sank a little when he saw her go upstairs with some guy from school. There were moments her and there, when she was alone, or thought no one was looking that he felt he saw the real Brooke Davis. Just a girl, fighting to find out who she really is and trying to mask the pain.


End file.
